There is never much to be said but a lot here to be read and if you are here to understand why I write or why I publish what I do write then it may be a good idea to start with yourself, as to why are you so bloody inquisitive? Maybe that is why you lost your day job, which is how you ended up with so much free time on your hands to be still reading this read-and-be-insulted rant…
Moving on, I am a qualified sommelier but it’s not how I began. Like all six year olds, I wanted to be a pilot, then something else, then it was a career as an engineer – no, wait, that was what dad wanted – then, was it an MBA? -I don’t recall anymore. But thing is, whatever my day job, I believe that I have a way with words, either that or I really suck as a wine taster! And yet I am highly awarded sommelier, duly recognised with an award-winning book and a long-running globally relayed TV show to my credit.
(No really, all that did happen. Yes makes me wonder too.)
So I allow myself this little indulgence, to write and publish my supposedly witty scribbles here on the site. And instead of saving these rants for my paid columns, I do all this contributing here with no monetary implications or financial endearments whatsoever! So what have you done by way of charity today, eh!?
But don’t worry, I won’t ask you money? If you are still reading this then clearly you are too broke to be bothered with. But it could be worse; if you were one from the ilk of “Shiny Happy People”, those who have it all including first world problems, then I reserve a special brand of envy-fed hatred for you.
When not tasting wine(hic!) I contribute to publications worldwide about food and beverages (preferably the carnivorous and the alcoholic kind respectively), mens’ style and bespoke experiences, luxury, travel… basically all forms of hedonism that I do personally enjoy to the hilt. Apart from this I swim, bike, and run and write about them all from time to time. Yes, my mid-life came in a bunch of three. I spend an inordinate amount of time and even more money indulging these sporty affairs which could explain my dwindled social status. That reminds me, do check out my relationship column PDFs under Printed Articles (PDFs): you know when they tell you that those you can’t do, teach? -Well they are too damn right!
The site is arranged by categories (which this blog insists on calling ‘slugs’, why I ask, why?!) so that when you click on a category all entries, both new and old, will turn up. Also, common slugs means that the same article can feature in two places. That way, you don’t have to hunt through dusty archives to find some hidden gem. You’re welcome. Although, soon you may realise the site only has about 42 articles which keep turning up in various permutations and combinations.
And this, folks, was the best way I found to recycle a slim selection of crappy rants and yet make it look voluminous since midnight Cable TV.
Only one sincere clarification: Nothing you read here (that which is written by me) will ever be a paid publicity or some tawdry endorsement except, of course, of my unsurpassed genius and limitless talents.
(That said, if you represent a big company, or even a small company with big pockets, then connect immediately; things can always be worked out.)
For the rest of you cheapskate thrill-seekers, read on, enjoy, laugh, get angry, leave me a comment, maybe I’ll reply, maybe I won’t, who knows, who cares…
There is a fine print to all this and the fine print says that there is no fine print.
…or was that free lunches? or Fight Club? Let me get back to you on that.
Oh, and one more thing, I split my infinitives and staunchly believe in the Oxford comma.